Latest News & Releases
March 15, 1998
News Posted: March 22, 1998
CALIFORNIA SUNSHINE, As Wayne Rogers would say "Now That's something" Anytime something is good ole Wayne says, "Now That's something" But to me what is something is the nuts that build a house with the bedroom hanging over a cliff, now that's bad enough in states where we get a lot of rain, which up until the past few years California didn't, But anyone that knows anything about California, knows we have hundreds of earthquakes in any 24 hour period, granted, most are small ones but, when you watch a mountain moving from side to side like we did in 1994, you thank God you ain't hangin' out over a cliff...If we wanted our zip-code to change we would move on our own> BUT, like the old song, "To Each His Own"
I am 100% convinced that only 2% of Americans can read and no one from a foreign country that has lived in the U.S. less than two years, if you think different then do this. On any highway in the U.S. look for a speed limit sign. Most highways in the California are 65-mph some a little higher and a lot a little lower.
O.K. so do this, when you pass a speed limit sign, set your cruise control for that number, 65-75-what ever it is, get in the right hand lane, drive 10 miles, how many cars passed you ?, how many drivers gave you the bird ?, how many could you see their lips move and by the scowl on their face knew they were not wishing you a good day?.
A few miles an hour one way or the other in most cases don't make a lot of difference, but the difference between 65 and 85 makes a life's worth of difference.
I know we have some friends that read this that are "HIGHWAY PATROL" officers, so we were wonderin' if you might do something for us ? below we'll put a few questions and you check them for us if you will, and either "E" mail us back or send them back by fax and we'll print the results just as you have given us the answers to these questions.
A-Speed limit signs are put up just for the heck of it and we don't really give a dang how fast you go ?. YES-NO-
B-Even though we do put up speed limit signs, we are hoping you will break them because it gives us something to do, and most of us Highway Men have got relatives that are undertakers, and really appreciate the business. YES-NO-
C-What really makes our day is trying to figure out which pieces of the bodies belong to who if it is really a nice crash, I know how much we all enjoyed talking about it at the station when a family of six was completely dismember and in the dark of the night, one of our officers had mistakenly put the wrong leg with the wrong body, that's why we really encourage night speeders. YES-NO-
D-We especially like it when construction workers are out there trying to repair and make our highways safer, working with head lights or flood lights, and they stick up those dumb "CAUTION" signs or other Construction safety signs, no-one is really supposed to read those anyway, besides we really get a kick out of watching people weave in and out and around those signs trying to hit one of the workers, who does he think he is anyway, out there in the middle of the night trying to make a living for his family. YES-NO-
E-I remember a few years ago when my partner and I answered a call one-night, it was late and raining. When we got there a family was dead or all but dead because of a speeder, the mangled bodies of the little children were every where. Not a day goes by that either one of us don't think about it, and as long as we live the hurt will never go away. YES-NO
All this is to say nothing about those who don't stop at stop signs, Let's go over this again, S T O P means just that, it is not short for (State Trouper Out Peeing)
ANYWAY we think you get the message. AMERICA is the greatest place on earth and believe me brother, you are going through it fast enough as is.
While we're at it, there are some other people that "TEE" us off also, those that spend thousand of dollars to go see foreign countries, and have no idea what is fifty mile down the road.
A couple of years ago my Brother wanted to go over to the birth-place of God and like the tour company said "WALK WHERE GOD WALKED", so he joined up with some others at the Church and they all went...The second day, three or four Banditos had surrounded my brother, got him in an alley or what ever they call them over there, and robed him.
NOW, he don't, but I do have something to be thankful for, my brother has a temper like a wild cat with a thorn in his side, if you "ask" he would give you the shirt off his back, but if you tried to take it, somebody is going to be hurtin' bad and chances are since he is about "six-two" and weighs about two seventy, it ain't a-gonna be him, but in this case, he said that, he said nothing, gave them his money, and they let him walk away...And what do I have to be thankful for ?, that he took Kenny Rodgers advice and knew when to hold um and knew when to fold um.
I don't know why he wanted to go anyway, he already knew what was going on over there, Besides, he already knew where GOD was born, he read it in the BIBLE.
SLOW DOWN AND SEE AMERICA, FIRST AND LAST
MACK IS BACK*********!!!!!!!!
WARNER MACK is back with a new double C.D. and it's a good one, we know you remember some of the great hits that Warner has had over the years, and now they are in a two pack C.D. set that you are really going to like ( we were going to say, Big Mack is back, but then you would think we were selling Cheese-burgers) and this C.D. ain't no burger but some great music.
Because of an auto accident a while back, Warner was just slowed down for a while, but now with the help of some good family and friends and a manager that is really working for Warner, well, here comes that rainbow.
Warner has made us up some radio station promos that along with some of his new C.D. music will be on the way this week to Denmark and some other countries.
Somebody, explain this one to me, some of the folks in some of these countries do not understand one word of English, yet they love Warner's music and most all the other great Classic Country artist from the U.S.> We are really happy that they do, but we still don't understand it, I ask my friend Dann over there in Denmark that question, he said "they don't like it, they love it" SO, we reckon that's all the answer we need.
A- D.J. from a local station that broadcast out of a big University here, called me the other day for some records, I ask him if he knew who Warner Mack was, he said "you kiddin,' I play the heck out of The Bridge Washed Out". Maybe there is some hope.
Now we gotta tell the truth here, I like them sad songs, If we wuz on one side of the bridge and my baby was on the other, by the time we went down to Hertz rent a boat, shot the breeze a while with the owner, told him what we needed, got it hooked up to the car, got back to the river, got the boat in the water, got it cranked up and ate lunch, we'd forget where we left her...so you can see, that song only applies to people that live in towns with faulty bridges, BUT, you take Warner's song of "God Bless The Lonely People" and sooner or later that will apply to all of us, I'm not lonely, but yesterday we did play the song 8 times, just because it's a great song.
Another one of Warner's song that will get you when the lights are off is "Is It Wrong For Loving You" > this was a great song for Warner Mack and this is a great album kids, pretty soon we will have something worked out with his manager Harrison Weaver as to where and how you can buy this new C.D.
This double C.D. contains 24 songs and they are all kick off your shoes and shut your eyes and listen songs, that is unless you are a truckin' on down the road, and if that be the case, just crank it up and sing along to "WARNER MACK...ONCE AGAIN"
Last week we said we were going to do a little story about Hank Snow and we are but not the one we had in mind at the time.
But we will do a little "nut-shell" of that story, and that is, When Hank was a very small boy, he had a step father that like to beat on him and treat him bad, finally Hank's Mother just all but through him out and we could only hope that the reason for that was, she was tired of seeing Hank being beaten >> Hank over those hard years had many jobs, life ain't easy for grown people, let alone very young people out in the world on their own, we can only imagine the tears that must have fallen during those lonely nights, just think of the times a little grand son or daughter spent the night at your house and in the middle of the night started to cry for mommy or daddy, and what grand parent doesn't give them more then mommy and daddy anyway, but they were still a little child and home was home and we all know what that means, NO-ONE is your Mother but your Mother and nothing that can be said will change that.
But above it all, with the help of a guitar worth only a few dollars, Hank whiled away the hours with that old guitar and then..pretty soon others started to listen..and to this day, they still are.
In the middle of the Mojave Desert from a little radio station in the middle of the night while I was playing Country Music for those who couldn't sleep and the Jack-rabbits and some lonely old truck drivers, I would write everyone I could find an address on, 90% of them never even bothered to write back or send me a record to play. HANK SNOW wasn't one of those, couldn't have been more than a couple weeks went by when a letter came from Hank Snow, before we opened it, it had to be from his secretary, no, it had to be from a fan club that the letter was passed on to, but not from Hank Snow.
Wrong, not only did Hank write the letter himself he sent us a catalog of all his records and said check what you need..Sure, Hank is going to go through his albums and send them to us, that'll be the day...Eleven days three hours and twenty six minutes later (give a little one way or the other) a fat package arrived at the station with my name on it..With eleven albums in it and the station promo that we had ask him to do for us, and another note that said, "You have the little catalog, anything else you need all you have to do is let us know" Your Friend, Hank Snow.
After all these years,we still have that letter, it is one of the things I will be putting in my package to take with me when I die..Next time down to Kentucky we are going to lay the wire for the sound system in our little graveyard down there, build a little cement building that will hold a fifty play C.D. player and let that thing play country music till the end of time, and once every fifty C.D's will be "I'm Movin' On".
Hank's son, the Reverend Snow said, "Dad's getting a little tired now" But the good Reverend knows and we know that Hank Snow will be on the stage of the "GRAND OLE OPRY" as long as there is a Grand Ole Opry, and long after "He Don't Hurt Anymore" HANK SNOW will still be "Moving On"
Some time ago we wrote something about taking something with us when we went, a friend of mine said "You gotta be crazy, man when your dead your dead and you ain't gonna be reading anything". I said "How do you know"??
We want to thank our friends down in "LEBANON", Tennessee at radio WJKM for reading some of these crazy things we write, and the reason we have Lebanon above, in fat letters is because last week when we wrote the town name we said Murfreesboro instead of Lebanon, now any fool knows that's the road, not the town, so to Harv, Grandpa Jack, Rabbitt Head, Stump Jumper and Killer and to good ole Ron for sending us a fax now and then, which is our only connection to the outside world, we know this next line will be edited by the cross-country-computer-ferry, but just in case it does get through, We are all being held prisoners out here and made to endure 80 degree weather, they have threatened to make us jump in the pool by next week, and those of us who didn't get washed away by you know who, will be forced to get a sun tan..
Thanks guys, crazy or not crazy we really appreciate you reading this stuff..
Watch for my good friend Ancel Cook in his new Coors Beer Commercial, and his new one from Taco Bell, they don't let him talk in this one though, just that short dog.
I could keep this up all night but I have got to go plant an orange tree, but before we go, we got one little joke to tell you, at least, we think it's a joke.
The Pope and President Bill had to use the same plane on a cross-country trip, they were flying along when all of a sudden the plane plunged into the ocean and they both drown, God was a little busy right then and he sent Bill to heaven and the Pope to the other place, Realizing later after he finished supper he had made a mistake he called 611 (mistake hot-line) and had it changed.
As the Pope and the President were passing in space, the Pope said to Bill, "Oh thank goodness, I really needed to speak with the Virgin Mary"=======Bill said, "Too Late."
Buddy, Don Hinson will be appearing at the Country Club in Burma on the 21st.
Cindy Walker will be appearing over a big plate of lizard burgers on the 22nd.
Wayne Rogers will be appearing in a dream shaking hands with Sue Thompson
As the spotlight slowly fades, we'll see you next week, but just in case, as ole Freddie would say "Well, Bless Your Heart"
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